We are for each other.
They are one person
They are two alone
They are three together
They are for each other
—Stephen Stills, "Helplessly Hoping"
I wasn't going to write something emotional today. I was going to be a complete smart-ass, write something funny to distract myself from being scared shitless, and hopefully have you all laughing with me, not at me...
I can't do it.
I can't do it because, as Spiff says, surgery and hospitals are just not funny. And although it may seem a bit dramatic to put a love note in my post before I go, well...sue me. If this situation ain't dramatic, I don't know what is. And if there is anything I want to publicly say about it, it's these two incredibly important things:
Twinkletoes, I love you, forever and ever and always. I'm on your side, little darling, no matter what.
Spiff, you are the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. Period. Being loved by you makes me feel like the luckiest woman in the world, and I can only hope that what I give you allows you to know in your heart just how precious you are to me. You're the other half of my own heart, and I love you exponentially more than I know how to say in words.
I am trying not to panic, trying to think positive thoughts, and I've got a gazillion (or at least a few) people thinking them for me too, and that means the world to me. You are all awesome.
So, off I go. I will be back in a week, hopefully not blonder than I already am. And if I end up seeing double, well...that's one less sock to make, and holy shit, there are TWO stunningly gorgeous loves of my life in my bed. How lucky is that, eh?
Until then, I leave you with the image I'm going to be keeping in my head while the doctors play around in there. This, to me, is the one, the only, the best "happy place" I can think of: in the arms of my petit atome. I waited a bloody long time for this, and I'm not giving it up, not for anything.
J'aimerais quand même te dire,
Tout ce que j'ai pu écrire
C'est ton sourire qui me l'a dicté...
May 15, 2005 11:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (35) | Print